“There is confidence in clarity. You will know what is for you, and what is not.”
The concept of femininity can mean different things to different people. For some, it's about embracing a softer side and celebrating traditional feminine qualities, while for others it's about breaking free from stereotypes and embracing a more diverse and inclusive understanding of what it means to be feminine. Whatever your interpretation, it's clear that femininity is a complex and multi-faceted concept that deserves exploration.
Meet the Expert
To gain insight into the topic of femininity, we had the pleasure of speaking with Sarah Bohdanova, the founder of The Femininity Project. Sarah will help you get out of your masculine and unapologetically embrace femininity as your superpower. With a mission to empower women to feel confident and comfortable in their own skin, Sarah has become a leader in the world of femininity and self-care. Someone who’s personally inspired me so much along my own journey.
In this interview, Sarah shares her perspective on what it means to be feminine and how women can embrace their femininity.
In your opinion, what does it mean to be feminine?
Femininity is the state of being a woman. It starts with a clear vision of how you want to show up in your life and then that translates into the way you live. You think through how you want to look, how you want to feel, and what type of energy you want to bring. It’s the intangible made tangible...
… and it will look different to every woman.
For me, femininity has always been spice and softness combined. I feel my most feminine when I’m creative, learning (I study Italian), and on a mission. When I dress beautifully and feel truly confident in my skin. When I’m present in my interactions, and bring a sense of play and intrigue.
In your experience, what are some common misconceptions about femininity that you see in society?
There are quite a few! Here are four of the most common:
- That you have to be a certain “type” of woman to be feminine (usually it looks something like wearing a lot of pink, making a mean sourdough, and singing to birds)
- That you can’t be successful, ambitious, or competitive and still be feminine (big, big lie!)
- That you should “just know how” to do certain feminine skills as a woman; that it should all just flow naturally to you (when in reality those “things” are learnable skills, and the women that you think are naturals, actually were taught it somewhere along the way).
- That you “set it and forget it”. That you can’t change. Whatever you wanted once, you should want for the rest of your life. This is a sure fire way to feel stuck! You should revisit your femininity vision like you revisit your goals. You are not the same woman you were 5 years ago, and you will likely be a different woman 5 years from now. The main thing is to make sure the change is intentional. You have different seasons in your life, the same goes for your femininity.
How do you think hustle culture can negatively affect women's ability to embrace and express their feminine energy, and what are some steps women can take to resist these pressures?
I think the problem with hustle culture is 2-fold. First, there is no “off” time.
It tries to convince women to celebrate and operate in a mode that will never bring us peace, being constantly on the go, and from a biological standpoint we were never built to operate like that. Our cycles move through weeks of rest, hustle, creativity, and more. Honoring our different rhythms will not only bring peace to our bodies but help us deliver better results ultimately.
It's also important to be able to flow through different energies depending on the task. For example, a soldier at war is going to be in a very different mode than when he is home with his family. It’s very important to have an “off” switch.
The second thing it does is try to convince women to act like men (who are built in a very different way). This completely robs us of the magic we bring as women and eliminates the special contributions that only we can make.
The truth is, you can be ambitious and still be feminine. You can have big bold goals while honoring your body and not pushing it to exhaustion. You can be successful and operate in a way that fuels you and gives you a sense of ease.
What are some practical tips or strategies that women can use to step into their feminine energy?
Improve your body language (my heels course is a great place to start!), work on your tonality and communication, develop feminine rituals that support you (morning, evening, weekly, monthly), learn to dress your body type and complexion, develop discernment, start studying men and understanding polarity (we are very, very different from men and this is actually a beautiful thing!).
The best tool to start with hands down is body language. When you learn how to carry your body in a feminine and confident way, people will start responding to you in a different way, you will start seeing yourself in a different light, and you will lower your cortisol levels. Win win!
What are some common challenges that women face when trying to embrace their feminine energy, and how can they overcome these obstacles?
A big challenge is letting go of what society told you would fulfill you. The advice being sold to women like… “You don’t need a man” … “Sleep with whomever you want, it’s empowering” … “You are perfect the way you are, never change”.
It’s not working. Women are more anxious than ever. They are unable to find partners and maintain healthy relationships, and then on top of that they are told: You’re perfect! Which is incredibly depressing if you’re not happy with where you are at!
The first step to overcoming these obstacles is to recognize where you currently are. If society’s way of thinking is giving you the results you want, brava! Keep it up!
If it’s not, then it’s time for a shake-up.
One other problem I see is women are lacking the tools that would turn their vision into a reality. For example, someone who wants to be organized but can’t seem to stop running late. They need to update their tool kit to start getting better results.
Can body care and self-care rituals support women in embracing their feminine energy? What are some of your favorite rituals to practice?
100%! You dedicate time to things you value as important. When you start dedicating time to nurturing yourself and your beauty, you start to see yourself as more valuable and important.
Some of my personal faves: walks out in nature, sauna sessions, and acupuncture.
What advice would you give to women who are hesitant to embrace their feminine energy, or who feel like they don't fit into traditional notions of femininity?
First, recognize your vision of a feminine woman will not be identical to anyone else so remove.the.pressure.please! Femininity doesn’t fit in a box, it’s not a one-size fits all.
Next, there are certain things you may be uncomfortable with simply because you never had them modeled to you, or you were told you weren’t that “type” of girl.
Hear me when I say this: EVERYTHING is learnable.
I would suggest that if there is something that piques your interest, learn the skill. Then once you can do it well, you can decide whether or not you want to incorporate it into your own femininity project.
In your opinion, what are the top five feminine energy traits that you believe are the most important for women to cultivate and express?
I think this list would vary from one woman to another but here are mine:
If I had a 6th, mystery would be in there too!
What are some common signs or symptoms that women may experience when their feminine energy is blocked, and what are some techniques or practices that can help to unblock and restore this energy?
When a woman feels blocked she won’t feel in sync with herself or with others. She will almost feel like there is this tornado stirring inside of her causing dis-ease.
This can present in big ways like emasculating men or feeling the need to compete or compare yourself to other women, or in the small day-to-day things like taking your phone to the washroom to scroll Instagram, or not being able to sit through an episode of a show because you’re jumping up and down finding things to do.
The first thing I would do is make the first hour of the day phone free. Get off the hamster wheel and start running your day versus being run by it. I start my morning with 10-15 minutes of quiet, then do 3 rounds of Wim Hof breathing in the fresh air, do my devotions, followed by a big glass of water. Dedicate your mornings to yourself and set yourself up to properly handle what the day will bring.
What type of services do you offer?
I offer private coaching, workshops, and online courses like my signature How to Walk in Heels course.
How can people connect with you?
The best way is to hop on my email list! I send out great content each week to empower women with tangible tools.
Here are the details to sign up: thefemininityproject.com
You can also find me on Instagram @thefemininityprojectinc
Or join my free private The Art of Dating
Your favorite MIFA product?
This is something of a Sophie’s choice because I absolutely LOVE and use them all. If I was going to be stranded on a desert island and could only take one product with me, it would have to be the oil… but I wouldn’t be happy to have had to make that choice!